So. That happened.

The first series of the year is completed - an interesting feeling after the long offseason, as if your psyche has to relearn how to handle the ups and downs of rooting for a proffessional sports team. For instance, if you told me that opening day would have Brandon Webb getting knocked around for six runs in a slugfest and that the next day Dan Haren would throw a three-hitter, one-run effort and still lose, I'd laugh in your face.

The Diamondbacks did lose the series though, in all the old familiar ways. The offense sputtered and then collapsed on the field, gasping choking for one last breath of life. Jon Rauch happened. New season means new hope but it felt like watching the same team that came apart down the stretch last September.

But all is not lost! (I mean, it's only been three games for crying-out-loud). Dan Haren is a beast, who continues to prove Trinity's theory that the only difference between him and Josh Beckett is some facial hair and half-a-dozen hemp necklaces. Sweet Jesus, I love this man. Trinity and I are taking a pilgrimedge to Chase Field Easter Sunday to watch Haren take on the Dodgers.

Also promising: Felipe Lopez. He had two homeruns on Mon and made a great play yesterday. I like you, Felipe Lopez.

I have other things to post about sometime, like why I can never remember what Baby Drew looks like and how Conor Jackson is totally the type to get drunk and go walk around the 99 Cent Store, but those are other thoughts for another time. Right now let's make like Barack Obama and reflect that hope springs eternal. Example: I eternally hope we beat the Dodgers.

Things I Do At 5 AM

A haiku:

O! Danny Haren
I love your hair and fastball
Are you a pirate?

The Dbacks play the Padres today and I have a feeling they may be a little sluggish tonight. Seeing as how they went 22 innings against Colorado last night. It was after 1 am when the Rockies finally won and the Padres still have to travel to Phoenix today. I mean, six hour game. Damn.

so it goes

Well, if you're going to lose, lose spectacularly. That seemed to be the attitude in the Diamondbacks' dugout as they were demolished by the Rockies today, 13-5. The mascot for today's crapshoot was pitcher Edgar Gonzalez. In three innings on the mound, Gonzalez allowed three runs, walked two and hit two, including hitting one guy in the head.

The Dbacks followed Gonzalez's example. Though they did score five runs, offense was not there today (notable exceptions: Salazar and Snyder, who finally remembered that he's expected to bat, too). Eric Byrnes took it upon himself to ground out to short at every opportunity. The normally superb Orlando Hudson had trouble baserunning after a hit was ruled an infield fly. Now, I am a bit new at this baseball thing and I did have to look up the infield fly rule. In order to prevent infielders from allowing balls to hit the ground or dropping balls to try and turn double plays, an umpire can declare any infield ball that is catchable through ordinary effort an "infield fly." The batter is automatically out and any baserunners can advance but at their own risk. Now, I don't see why they don't just let them turn the double play, because the batter shouldn't hit that way and I don't think it's fair to punish the batter, especially if the infield fails to make the catch, but that's the rule. But Hudson decided to try and advance, not realizing the batter was out, and caused him to get tagged out.

The bullpen, including previously reliable Pena also suffered a complete meltdown. It was not pretty. And yeah, we were due for a loss. I just don't like to see everything come completely apart. Now, the Dbacks need to put the loss behind them as tomorrow the Big Unit takes the mound in his first start this year against the Giants. And hey, it's the Giants. Your local baseball rec team could beat the Giants right now.

Game Day, Char here

My first trip down the old BOB Chase Field since 2002 (I remember because they gave away World Series DVDs that day) was a resounding success. The Diamondbacks secured their seventh win in a row, pounding the Colorado Rockies 8-2. Brandon Webb was masterful, going eight innings allowing two runs on four hits and striking out six. Eric Byrnes homered and drew a walk, finally starting to look like he can do more than whack away at any pitch that comes in his general direction. Justin Upton and Orlando Hudson also homered. I was a little disappointed not to see Baseball Boyfriend Dan Haren live and in the flesh but, well, we can't have everything.

A Chicks and Sticks salute to the guys in section 203 for general awesomeness. Not only did they give a friend of mine a high five for her, shall we say...enthusiastic rendition of "Take Me Out to the Ball Game," but they also adopted one of my nicknames. Itty bitty Stephen Drew, shortstop to the Dbacks and brother of Red Sox JD Drew looks about 16 and since his brother plays for the Sox, I've started calling him Baby Drew. Well hell, if by the fourth inning, the guys in front of us weren't going "Come on, Baby Drew!" Spread it like wildfire, folks.

Conor Jackson (seen above, doing the pee pee dance) also returned to the lineup after leaving game three of the Dodgers series early to have his wrist examined after he was hit by a pitch, his third HBP in two games. I have decided that Conor "Gravity" Jackson keeps his powers in his eyebrows, which are so large they clearly have their own gravitational pull. No wonder he keeps getting hit.

A question: sequestered where they are behind screens and fences, the bullpen is the kids' table of baseball y/n?

And a tip for anyone making the trip to Chase Field (which I recommend, the stadium is quite nice now and the HD scoreboard is a thing of beauty) be careful where you walk. Downtwon Phoenix is very industrial so if you're walking away from the stadium and all you see are warehouses, you might want to turn around and try going another way, or you might find yourself in a situation where it takes you an hour to get to your car. Hypothetically. Not that I know from experience or anything.